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Monthly Archives: April 2018

Newly Discovered Maya Megalopolis Had Parking Woes (2018 April Fool’s Day)

(Image credit: National Geographic Magazine)

Guatemala, April 1 2018: Startling new revelations about the size and scope of the ancient Central American Mayan civilization have antiquities scholars agape. These new discoveries are now roiling the parking and transportation world as well, thanks to additional insights provided by a self-described, “parkaeologist”.

Hidden Maya Leafy Green Suburbs

According to the National Geographic magazine, “Using a revolutionary technology known as LiDAR (short for “Light Detection And Ranging”), scholars digitally removed the tree canopy from aerial images of the now-unpopulated landscape, revealing the ruins of a sprawling pre-Columbian civilization that was far more complex and interconnected than most Maya specialists had supposed.”

Academics are already debating the purpose of the many structures unveiled by the LiDAR research. The expanse of the ruins, covering hundreds of square miles, has also further fueled speculation on the centuries-old mystery of how and why the Mayan civilization collapsed.

University of Freedonia at Laputa Adjunct Professor for Mesoamerican Antiquities, Dr. Cosmo Kardashian, is not surprised by these discoveries. He claims that mainstream science knows what killed the Mayan culture, but has conspired to ignore the truth, due to entrenched special interests.

So, Dr. Kardashian, what destroyed the Maya?

“Overbuilt…Continue reading

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